Anatomy of a Shit-Show

4:15: saw weatherman on television.

4:20: walked outside. Seems okay.

4:25: called wife and told her not to drive home. (did not listen).

4:30: thought, “maybe I should get the girls from daycare.” Walk outside. Not so good anymore.

4:32: get to end of street. Is that the siren?

4:34: pick girls up. More like, “get your asses in the car,”

4:36: almost make it to two streets when the traffic stops and the wind picks up 25 ft in front of the car. Can’t see past the wall of wind. Crap self.

4:38: hail on the car. middle of street u-turn. Not so funny anymore girls, is it?

4:40: reach daycare. Spending time with children. Check underwear; we’re good.

I questioned my residency today. If I were back in Alaska, the story would have ended a long time ago with – earthquake stops.

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